S1E29 - The Thing

Welcome back to another episode of Disc Read Error, the podcast where every week we dive into the extensive and fascinating library of the greatest selling video game console of all time, the PlayStation Two. I'm Derek Kicker.

I'm Ian Golding.

And this week, you can't trust anyone.

You really can't can't trust these hoes.

In Antarctica because we're playing The Thing for Blockbuster Monthly.

Get them.

Do you like do you like The Thing movie?

I think it might be my favorite movie.

Yeah, it's definitely up there for me.

Fucking amazing movie.

I just love it.

It is definitely my favorite.

Kurt Russell.

Movie about John Carpenter.

That's hard.

Maybe.

I know it is hard.

It's actually halloween is so good.

Halloween is so perfect.

I really like they live they live's very good.

Rowdy. Rowdy.

I like vampires.

James woods.

I liked vampires. I didn't love vampires.

Such a goofy ass me. But assault on Precinct 13.

Fan fucking tastic movie. Yeah.

Prince of Darkness. Hell yeah. The fog in the mouth of madness. One of the wildest fucking movies ever.

Fucking big trouble. Big Trouble. Little China.

Yeah, that's true.

That could be my favorite Kurt Russell movie.

I like this better than that.

I love that fucking movie. That movie is fucking the tits.

The tits. Also great musician.

Yeah.

No, he does all his own scores. That synth sound that you know, it when you're like, oh, that's the old Carpenter fucking sound. I meant Stranger Things.

Stranger Things. Straight fucking rip off the John Carpenter sound.

Yeah, but I don't think they make any secret that that's completely fucking intentional.

Yeah, but it's a good point of reference for you. For you, Whippersnappers. But that has nothing to do with The Thing.

Where do you think it is, Captain? I don't know and I don't care. Looks like a goddamn UFO to me. This shit gives me the creeps. Yeah. We're not alone in the universe and all that crap. Check it out and move on.

Which came out on the PlayStation Two. And I could not believe this when I read it. September 10, 2002.

Wow.

Okay.

Yes. I did not think this game was that old.

No, I didn't either. Wow. Surprising.

Yeah.

And it came out the week before on the Xbox.

Fuck them. Fuck them.

And two weeks before that, it came out on Microsoft Windows.

So it was a three week late. Yeah.

Old Microsoft Windows. This game was published on the consoles by Konami.

Great. Not developed by them.

It was developed by a company called Computer Artworks.

What a name.

What a name.

Yes.

They are no longer around anymore. A British developer, I feel like this. We've had a string of British developers.

So many British developers like crazy.

They did a game called Evolva, which is just quite the name.

Yeah, quite the name.

And then they did this game.

Interesting.

Okay.

So there was that, then this, and then it's actually kind of hard.

To find information on them. They're not around anymore.

But evolve.

You got to keep saying it.

And The Thing are, like, the things that they're really known for.

Interesting.

Okay.

And I've never even heard of this fucking Evolve a game. It's on steam.

I might have to check that out.

Yeah. And it actually looks kind of similar to The Thing. It is a third person action game, like The Thing.

Okay.

Which is a third person squad game.

Sure.

Yeah. So this game is like a third person, like, survival horror kind of game. And its development started in earnest in 2000. Universal was looking through their catalog and was like, what? Can we fucking turn into a video game?

Yes.

And of course, they came across The Thing.

Hey, what about this one?

And they were going to make a Game Boy version of this, too, which seems very funny, but it was canceled early in production. But I looked up what other games Universal Interactive was doing at this time. So they did the grinch.

Oh, wow. Okay. Yeah.

The grinch for the dreamcast.

I didn't even know.

And the PS One, I didn't even.

Know that was a Thing for Dreamcast.

So obviously, they were also doing, like, helping with Crash Bandicoot and Spyro and all that. But I was just looking for straight up movie games they were doing at this time. In 2000. They did the Grinch. They also did The Mummy, which was a game that I remember loving as a kid based on the Brendan Frisure.

Okay. That Mummy. Sure.

And it sucks shit. I played it, like, maybe a year.

Ago because I was like, oh, I.

Have such good memory. It unplayable. They did woody woodpecker racing.

Sure. I mean, why not? Why wouldn't you?

Then they did. The mummy returns in 2001 for the PS Two.

Back to the well. Yeah.

And then in 2002, they did Bruce Lee quest of the dragon for the Xbox.

Oof, yeah.

They did. The Scorpion King rise of the Acadian.

They just go back. They just keep going back.

Yeah.

Loving it. And then, of course, this game.

Sure.

And then 2003, they did The Hulk, Jurassic Park, operation Genesis, which we will be doing.

I like that game.

We will be doing. They also did Bruce Lee return to the legend for the Game Boy advance.

Interesting.

Also Battlestar Galactica for the PS Two and Xbox.

Oh, we're playing that.

But is that before the Reboot?

No, this is the reboot. The Edward james almost reboot, I believe.

Okay, we got to play that.

We got to play that.

Yeah. So they were doing the damn thing, and they had seen Evolva and were like, oh, shit.

Can you do this with can you.

Do this with this thing? And they did a pitch, and Universal.

Is, like, sick, and here we are. Yeah.

And they released a demo, and they did cite some influences. Resident Evil, which I think is pretty apparent.

Pretty obvious, yeah.

Silent Hill. Also pretty obvious.

Very obvious, yes.

Grand theft auto.

Three. Maybe not so obvious.

Not so obvious. But of course, not shocking because of the time frame we're in.

Yeah.

I think everything after Grand Theft Auto Three was kind of inspired by Grand Theft Auto 3100%. And Max Payne.

I love Max Payne.

Which also makes sense, of course.

Yeah, it does.

There's a lot of information on the development, kind of, but very little information on the developer.

Got it.

But one thing I did think was cool is the game was endorsed by Carpenter.

Really? Okay.

And apparently he has a cameo appearance in the game. I don't know where.

I did not spot him.

I didn't spot him. His voice. Yeah.

Old fucking cigarette smoking hippie. Did not I didn't hear that come through.

Yeah, but let's talk about the plot.

Blake. It's Whitley. What's the situation?

Not good.

What do you see?

Not a goddamn thing in this storm.

Have you found anything?

Well, your transmitter's down and everything else is FUBAR. What do you mean? The base is gone, Colonel. It looks like massive explosives damage. Any clues here are going to be like finding a needle in a haystack.

Understood.

So this is I guess this is considered not canon in the extended thing. Averse?

It can't be.

Yeah, but it is a sequel to.

The John Carpenter movie.

Yes.

Speaking of which, you know a movie I watched recently?

What's that?

The prequel thing movie, also called The Thing.

Why did you watch that? That movie is hot. Stinky fucking shit. That movie is shit.

Okay, so I saw it when it came out.

I did, too.

In what, like, 2010?

That seems about right.

Yeah, and I just didn't really think much about it. I didn't hate it. But it's kind of like in the Zeitgeist that it's, like this horrible fucking movie.

It is this horrible fucking movie.

But I watched it recently, and I don't think it's good. But I also don't think it's, like, offensively bad.

But that's what makes it offensively bad, because it's just so middle of the road milk toasty. It's just your standard. It didn't need to be related to The Thing at all. That's the problem. They just made the most boring ass, buy the numbers fucking horror movie and then tied it to The Thing, which is what makes it fucking awful to me.

And I think there was some cool, like, visual effects in it.

OOH, CGI. That's so hard to do.

But it looks good.

Fuck them. CGI.

At that time looks like shit. They could have come out looking like the fucking Gary Oldman, Lost in Space monster.

Love that monster.

I know, right? It was so scary when I was a kid. But yes, this is a sequel, so this would be the third in line.

From that, and none of them are.

Related to the original. The thing movie. Right, because the John Carpenter one is just a straight kind of remake.

Yes, it is.

Yes.

So this game takes place afterwards.

Yes.

And Special forces. Tier one operators go into Outpost 31. The infamous Outpost 31.

Yes.

And they fucking disappear.

Yes.

So in what is the most blatant Resident Evil rip off of all time, the Alpha team has to go in to find Bravo team, and I am positive, almost, I played this game, like, a week ago, that the teams are called Bravo and Alpha, just like Resident Evil.

Oh, they absolutely are. Yes.

Yeah.

So Alpha team comes in to see what the fuck happened. They find a spaceship, like in the.

Prequel, and a tape recorder with a.

Message on it describing how you can't trust anyone.

It's true.

It's true.

Yes.

And then they find all sorts of fucking blood everywhere. They find the body of Child.

Yes, they do. Which answers a question, unfortunately.

But Kurt Russell McCready. McCready not nowhere to be found. Not there.

Certainly not. Certainly not.

So throughout a bunch of fucking setting shit to explode, running around doing things, you eventually realize that, like, hey, this fucking Thing thing was actually being studied by the government. By the government. Because you can't trust the government.

Because you can't trust the government.

Yeah.

And that they've isolated a microbiological form of the thing called the cloud virus.

God damn it.

And like the T virus, it was intended for biological warfare.

Yeah.

And then everyone in the facility gets infected, and you find out that Whitley, the guy who was, like, in charge of all the bullshit, had injected himself with the cloud virus to cure his terminal cancer. And just that never fucking works out.

Of course not.

This is a real William Birkin resident Evil Two kind of fucking situation.

Yes.

And then you fucking set shit on fire, blow shit up, as you do, and then Willie transforms into this fucking huge I mean, the Resident Evil comparisons are going to come because it's so it's so obvious. Yeah. It's so apparent. And you're fucking fighting outside for the last boss and the massive last boss. And then a helicopter pilot comes and helps you, helps you defeat the Thing, and then you get in the helicopter and you fly away.

Yes, but then there's the twist. Yeah.

Big twist.

There's the big twist.

Here it comes.

The pilot, McCready.

McCready.

Boom, boom. He survived.

And he's not the thing. Or fucking is he?

He has to be. I mean, I don't know.

Why would he save him then? He could have just let him die. But it's also here's one thing to be clear. The game does not elude to McCready maybe being the Thing.

Not no, it doesn't.

But if you think about the end of the movie, he has to be. Because if you take this movie, if you take this game at face value, you find Child's dead of hypothermia. He's a human. One of them was the Thing has to be recreated.

And fuck, that really throws a fucking wrench in the whole universe of The Thing.

Best not to be discussed is the way I look at it.

Now, I'm just going to say this because this should be obvious. If you have not watched John Carpenter's The Thing yeah, go watch it right now. Turn off this podcast. The only time I give you permission to turn off the fucking podcast. Go watch this movie.

It is a mastery. I would call it a fucking mastery of how to build and release tension in that movie. Like, if you really want to see how a movie can put you on the fucking edge and then quickly pull you back and then fuck with you again, watch The Thing.

It is perfect.

It is craft. It is fucking amazing.

Yeah, it is wild. Like I said, it's one of the best movies of all time.

Yeah, it has to be.

And it just gets better with every viewing.

Yes, they did a really nice Blu ray transfer about 510 years ago.

Pick that up.

A really? Is there a 4K yet?

A 4K?

UHD, of it, that I don't know. I know they did a nice Blu ray transfer, which I own, one of the few Blu rays I still own, that Carpenter was involved in I forgot his DP. But his DP was involved in and they made sure it looked right.

Well, the story of this game is not great.

No, it's not great at great.

It's not the worst thing ever, but it's not great.

It's a little basic, because this game.

Is not really about story. No, this game is about the gameplay. This is not fucking the last of us.

No, sir.

This is a game that the gameplay is so crafted and so intentional. That's why I was so shocked that it came out in 2002.

Right, so let's talk about the gameplay.

Blake, you need anything repaired or even a simple bypass, and I'm your man.

If any of you take on any.

Damage, get back to me ASAP and.

I'll help you out. I'm not carrying any dead bodies back.

I'm locked, loaded and ready to make shit dead. You play as Blake.

Blake?

Belake. What is it? And you have a team around you.

And how do I put this?

The gameplay of this game is hard to talk about because there's not a ton of analogs.

No, there's not.

This is an AI co op game.

Yes.

So you have people in your squad and you can't directly control them, but your interactions with them are crucial to your success in the game. So you run around, you pick up weapons, you pick up health supplies, you pick up adrenaline injections. Very rarely, you find blood tests, which are obviously important, and there's all kinds of items, and you can distribute those items to your team yes, you can. And what I think one of the most unique systems of this game and again, you kind of have to see the movie to really appreciate this game. But the most unique system of this game is the trust system.

Yes.

So members of your team have a certain level of trust in you, and you can degrade that trust, or you can build that trust. So let's say your trust is really low with one of your teammates. They could turn on you.

Yes.

They could absolutely fucking turn on you. And how do you gain their trust back? Well, if you give them weapons, if you give them health, if you do a blood test on yourself in front of them, that can help build their trust in you. Things that can degrade their trust in you. Taking away all their shit, pointing your gun at them for long periods of time, accidentally shooting them.

Yes.

This can all degrade their trust in you. And the trust thing is super important.

Yes.

But there's also another kind of cool. Did you ever okay, this is a hard game to fucking talk about.

It really is.

It's complicated.

It is.

For a PS Two game, it's incredibly complicated.

Yeah.

This game has a lot of systems for a PS Two game, a lot of things going on. You have this trust system. You also have a wellness sort of system with your guys so they can be scared into having a heart attack and dying. They can be so appalled by the horrors on this Antarctic base that they pull their gun on themselves and commit suicide.

Yep.

And not only that, every time you encounter a thing, one of the members of your team could have been infected.

Yes.

So you cannot trust your team, but you have to put some trust in them. And that's really where the game shines. The combat is fine. The bosses are fine. The level structure is fine.

Right.

But this complex game that you're playing.

With your squad, it's literally a game within a game.

It's a game within a game. And it's the best thing about this game. It is so complicated and so stressful.

Yes.

This is a stressful game, which, for as much as they blew it on the story, the Thing is a stressful movie.

Yes, it is.

So I really got to give them kudos for the adaptation into a game because I think they understood the main thing about the Thing.

Yeah.

They understood that the feel was very important. Like, how you feel the emotion, the.

Vibe is so much more important than the story, than the combat. And the combat is not bad by any stretch.

It's fine.

It's third person.

Shoot them up.

That's really what it is. But this system of how you have to distribute your equipment, your resources, who to give guns to, who not to give guns to. Because if you give guns to the wrong person, you could fuck yourself.

Yes.

But then how do you know if their trust is low? Their trust could be low and they could also be the Thing.

They could be the thing.

So it's like, are you confident enough.

That they're not infected to give them.

Weapons or give them health to build that trust back up? It is a very delicate balancing act.

Yeah. It's a lot more complicated than, honestly, I expected going into this. I did not think that The Thing game was going to have this thinking back. Of course it had to. But I did not expect any kind of evolved that's the word I have to use, evolved gameplay ideas in this.

And on top of this, to add a whole nother layer of complexity to it. The three NPCs that you're with are different classes.

Yes.

So there are medics who can heal your squad members, and there are engineers which you need to unlock doors. And the soldiers have generally more health than everyone else and have better aim.

So there's a lot to parse.

There's a lot to do with this game. And the AI is pretty fucking clever.

It is.

It's again, surprisingly clever.

I'll give a good example of a game that has an AI. You have an AI companion that is worse than this and is much newer than this. Resident Evil five. If you've ever played with the co op, with Cheva, if you've ever played without a couch co op person or online with someone that AI is fucking atrocious, she will use all your ammo. She is a terrible fucking shot. This game's AI is much better than that. And this game is fucking, what, eight years before?

Yeah.

Eight years older than Resident Evil Five. On a completely different generation of console. This is two years into the PS Two s lifespan. Resident Evil Five is firmly in the middle of the PS Three lifespan.

Yeah.

So the system of which their fear system, it's called the crack up system.

Right.

So you're either in normal scared or crack up. And when you enter crack up mode, when someone else enters crack up mode, you will have, like, a very short window to reduce their fear. Or they will kill themselves or attack you. Or kill the other people in your squad.

Yeah. Kill the other squad members.

Yes.

And the higher their fear is, even before crack up, they shoot shittier. They take longer to do their jobs. And the only way you can reduce the fear is by giving them more ammo, killing enemies, so the enemies aren't there to scare them anymore. You can give them adrenaline injections or you can move.

Yeah.

If you just get out of the scary place.

Yeah.

So you kind of have to think about this stuff the whole time and you have to kind of manage your team.

I'm going to mention a game that I think a lot of people who may have been listening to us talk about this might. It's incredibly similar to Darkest Dungeon with the stress system. I don't know if you've played that.

But I have not.

I played Darkest Dungeon. I didn't play this until we played it for the thing. I didn't play the thing until we played it for the podcast.

Isn't darkest dungeon on PS one.

No. Darkest Dungeon is like fairly new. It's in the last five or six.

I'm thinking of something else then.

Yeah, you are. But it's like a dungeon crawler rogue, like whatever you call it. But it has what's called a stress system and it can happen to any members of your four person party. But it's the same shit as this, where they can run away, where they can start attacking the other players. I really wonder if the Darkest Dungeon people would count this as a huge influence because it's so similar to me.

Yeah, it's kind of crazy.

Yeah.

There are certain times in the game where members of your team will transform. It's scripted.

You can't do anything about it, which.

Can be a bummer if you just healed them or you just gave them some shit. But whenever you come under attack by an enemy, you can be infected. Someone in your team can be affected and it is fucking random.

Yes.

You cannot figure it out. They could straight up be stabbed by a thing and not be infected. Or they could be in the same room as a thing and get infected.

Right.

And then eventually they'll just turn into a thing and attack everyone on the team.

Yeah, exactly.

It is so fucked. Yeah, it's fucked and so awesome. But that's really where the game shines.

Yes.

And this isn't a long game either. This game is like 5 hours.

Yeah, if that.

But also I feel like this game kind of has like a cult following.

Kind of like the movie. Yeah.

Because this game is pretty expensive really? For a PS two game.

Right.

For PlayStation Two, this is like a $40 game.

Oh, wow.

Okay. So real fucking expensive.

Yeah.

Not like the most expensive of games, but no, $40 puts it in the medium range of these games. And it's also not easy to find. Like, I lucked out with my copy.

But it's not super common. Wow, interesting. But hey, what the fuck do we.

Know about video games?

What do we know? We don't know shit.

We don't know shit about it. Let's see what everyone else said about it.

Excellent timing there, pilot. Early retirement from Gen Inc. No, not exactly. On my way back from an extended Arctic vacation. So what's your name, smart ass? McCready.

So on the PlayStation Two, metacritic gives this game a 78 out of 100, which is pretty fucking high. Especially for like a licensed game.

Yeah, it seems a little high.

Yeah.

But maybe, right? I'm not sure yet.

Yeah. Based on 27 reviews. Not bad. Here we go. We have a hot take from Eurogamers, Kristen Reed. Hot take, who is a man, a man named Kristen.

Okay, we've already got Kristen's already rolling a boulder uphill, but go on.

Yeah, real SIS of yeah, struggle with that name. Kristen Reed scored the PlayStation Two version, a five out of ten arguing of the trust fear system. Quote, it is nowhere near as much of a neat gameplay innovation as the hype had some people believe.

Kristen. Yeah. Boo. Kristen.

Boo.

Kristen. Ass take.

I was saying boo. Earns.

Yeah, total ass take. Garbage. Garbage take. Garbage take. He also was critical of the graphics, which he argued look old school. What does that even fucking mean in 2002? Because it sure as fuck doesn't look like a 16 bit game. Yeah, I guess it looks better than a PlayStation One game.

That's what he's saying is it feels like a PlayStation One game. And I can't agree with that.

I know, because it looks better, objectively looks better than a PlayStation One game, so Kristen, you suck. Shit. And then he tried to walk it back by saying, if you can pick up the thing cheap, you won't be disappointed. It's by no means a bad game.

Fuck you.

But it's all the more disappointing thanks to the fact that it could and should have been brilliant.

Fuck you.

Fuck you.

Shut up.

Fuck you.

Shut up.

Fuck you, you're shit. Kristen.

Kristen, come on the pod and we'll fist fight you.

Yeah.

Okay, now we're talking. Now I'm ready.

Hell, yeah.

Turns out Kristen, like, fucking got, like, fucking degenerative disease and has been fighting, and his little brother just fucking everyone is inspiration to everyone. And we're all calling Kristen out for one bad take on a video game.

He single handedly 20 years ago created, like, the COVID Vaccine. Yeah.

And we're like, yeah, get him.

Shove him in a locker. Or he died, like, saving a bunch of babies and puppies and kittens from, like, a burning fucking tire fire.

If that's the case, we apologize in.

Advance, Kristen, but fucking if anything less than that yes. Fuck you, Kristen.

Literally. Literally anything less than that.

Yeah. Well, yeah. Eurogamer gave it a five out of ten. Game Spot gave it an 8.4 out of ten.

Okay. More than okay.

Game Spy gave it a four out of five stars. Fair IGN gave it an 8.3 out of ten.

Wow.

Official US PlayStation Magazine gave it a three out of five stars. I feel like out of five is just not enough.

No, it's so hard.

You can't be on the fence about stuff.

Well, especially when you're an out of five land. If you do half, even, like, three and a half is what 70% is.

A three and a half star game. Really a c. Yeah.

That seems low, but when you get to four, you're at 80% and you're, like, 80 out of 100 I feel like you got to go out of ten at the very least. Honestly, our reviews should be out of 1000. All reviews should be out of at least 1000. So you can really get the nuance.

It's very funny. That like famitsu theirs is, like, out of, like, 43 or something.

Yeah.

Funny seeing their reviews.

But see, that probably makes sense because they probably have a number scale for each category. It's probably very regimented.

This game did win at the Game Developers Conference GDC. It won Game Innovation Spotlight Award for 2003. So suck on that, Kristen.

Yeah.

Welcome back, Kristen. Welcome back to the convo.

It also won a Golden Joystick Award, which sounds like a pornographic award.

Really? Yeah.

For best use of a film license, which I can get behind, I think.

So this is one of the better film licenses out there, I'd say.

Absolutely.

Yeah.

It was nominated for game spot's annual best action game on Xbox Award.

Okay.

Valedictorian.

That went to motherfucking splinter cell, which.

I yeah, splinter cell.

That makes sense.

Very good game. Splinter cell.

Splinter Cell was like you remember that feeling you got when you first played Metal Gear Solid? Oh, shit. You mean I don't have to kill everyone?

Yeah.

Splinter Cell was like the next evolution of that. I think Splinter Cell was just so.

Good in that it did feel like the old cliche, the only limits were your imagination. You know what I mean?

It also felt authentically next generation. It looked and felt and sounded like there was no part of it that was stuck in this path. And that's part of it being like an Xbox exclusive at that time.

Nothing.

So yeah, but I think yeah, it.

Was just kind of a really good game.

Pretty good. Pretty good game.

Welcome to Sticky Disk Tray, the podcast where we talk about Xbox games.

Talk about where am I supposed to put this goddamn thing? The Xbox podcast.

I'm glad I had to shove this fucking adapter in to get the DVD player remote control to work.

Oh, good. There's a big giant power brick in the cord, too. Oh, you spoil me, Microsoft.

Yeah.

Thank you for rounding the top of this console so I can't put anything on it. You motherfuckers.

Get them.

Also, thanks for making it 57 pounds.

Yeah, that original Xbox. Wherever you put it, that's where it was going to stay for a long fucking time.

And there was never an Xbox slim.

No, because they were just like, we'll just put a PC in a smaller box with some giant fans and fuck it all.

This is a lesson they would learn on the 360 because there was, like 16 different versions of the 360.

Yeah. All of them red ringed. Yeah.

Well, Ian yeah. We're at our favorite part of the show.

We are.

What are you going to rate this game?

So this is a tough one because of my. Love of the film, The Thing, but it kind of throws me off because I love the movie. So am I against the game for changing the story and giving us what I think is like an unneeded continuation of a story I love? Or just the fact that because I.

Love the movie, do I automatically love.

The I really I've got to give it like the most cop outest possible review.

Well, think about it this way. You hate the prequel, so you don't really have any sort of allegiance to the franchise.

But I have an allegiance to McCready, and he is in the one scene.

He is in the helicopter pilot, somehow, for some reason so good it looks nothing like Kurt.

Oh, no. And he's got, like, a cowboy hat. Not even a cowboy hat. I can't even describe the hat. It's a stupid hat. Anyhow, I am going to end up.

Giving The Thing, and I'm going to.

Go out of a thousand because I said that we should. So I'm going to 754 out of 1000. Blowtorch wire, blood tests. Best scene ever.

Hell yeah.

How much did you give it?

754 out of 1000.

So seven and a half out of ten.

That four, though. See, that's what I'm saying, though. That four slides.

It a little higher. I like that.

I'm going to stick to out of ten, though.

Fine.

And I also love this movie. And I'll be honest, I kind of love this game.

Yeah, there's something about it that is very interesting.

It's hard to look away from. It kind of makes you want to keep playing.

Sure.

Even if there are parts of it that are boring. So I'm going to give it.

A seven and three quarters out of ten.

775 out of 1000. I'm going to translate.

Yeah, 775 out of 1000. Questionable bathroom blood stains.

Beautiful. It is a good game, despite if it didn't have the Thing license, I'm not sure my rating would be much higher or lower. It is a good game.

The team I think my rating might be a little higher if it wasn't a thing, because then the Incoherent kind of story wouldn't be tied to anything.

Right.

And I think it might be a little better in that way.

Okay, let me throw this at you. And I know let's say no thing license and this is an import where it's in Japanese and there are subtitles. I think your rating goes through the fucking roof. And this is like one of those weird classics, honestly.

Yeah.

Because the Incoherent story is suddenly just like, well, it's Japanese.

Yeah, it's eastern.

Yeah, exactly. I think so.

Yeah.

This is a game that is just like begging for a remaster remake. Come on, give it to us. Give it to us. Who owns the thing? Universal.

Still Universal.

Universal hasn't been broken apart for fucking pieces yet.

Not yet. Not yet.

Come on. Universal Interactive. We do not give a fuck about Crash Bandicoot Five. No, just give us a thing. Remake.

Just put it put it there's got to be an anniversary of the movie coming up sometime. The 20 eigth anniversary, I'm sure.

Yeah, just rematch. Put it on the switch. For the love of God. Just let us fucking play it.

Let's fucking play it on a new hardware where we can hit the fucking the PlayStation button in the middle and it shows our fucking team members trust or something. I don't even know.

Yeah, just do it. Just do it.

Do it.

Do it.

What are you waiting for? Do it. Just do it.

Yes, you can just do it.

All right, thanks so much for listening to our episode on the Thing.

Make sure you smash that like button subscribe wherever you get your fucking podcast. I personally use overcast. I don't know. What do you use?

I use Overcast as well, but I don't pay for ads because ads are the lifeblood of creators.

But some other people I know do.

Pay for ads on Overcast. That's all I'm going to say.

I do pay for no ads, or no ads, rather.

Yeah, that's right.

But that's primarily because I like to support independent developers.

Sure. I'm sure they're working on an AI, and you're helping fund me that I'm.

Not skipping ads in the podcast. That's how podcasters make money. They're not making any money off the fucking banner for dick pills on Overcast.

Fair enough.

All right. Speaking of dick pills, do you have problems getting it up? I wish. But hey, Blue Chew, if you want.

To throw some money, throw us some money. We'll talk boners or lack thereof.

But make sure you also follow us on social media, not Twitter, because we forgot the password and the username to that account. You can follow us on instagram at discrete AirPod. You can also follow me at Funeral casual games.

I'm at Ian Golding Games.

And you can also follow me on Whatnot at funeral Casual. Speaking of which, we want to give a big discrete error.

Cyber hug.

Cyber hug to friend of the pod, the Monster Den, on whatnot? He is going through some health issues, and we just want to say we're sending good vibes your way. Hope you get better soon. And yeah, we're thinking about you, buddy.

Absolutely, we are. All right, well, thanks again and we will see you next week. Barbum bar bing.